Returns are Cheesy

In interesting times I have may aim to live. For distance, I have only disdain to give.

Not subtle the creeping of my regret. But weaker still the wavering gets.

For perspective is weak without motivation. We are blind without some manner of expectation.

So I am done playing for today. Expect more from my war on clichés.

Awesome Sauce

Have you ever gotten the excitement when you see something you love translated from one medium to another? Like that amazing adaptation of war journals into a film by Francis Ford Coppola? Or the webcomic that becomes a motion-comic? Or a poem that becomes a song?

For me this one of those times. I see a person becoming a blog.

http://mehreenr.tumblr.com/

Mehreen's eccentric approach to life is best sampled by you if my excitement isn't indication enough. I can't wait for there to be at least 500 posts here... A month? That is the frequency of observations you will be subjected to. I will arm you with this advice, relieve yourself of all preconceived notions about coffee and blackberries. In capable genuine hands, she will make art with them.

Follow.

Part of the Problem

"Sleep paralysis: A frightening form of paralysis that occurs when a person suddenly finds himself or herself unable to move for a few minutes, most often upon falling asleep or waking up. Sleep paralysis is due to an ill-timed disconnection between the brain and the body.

The symptoms of sleep paralysis include sensations of noises, smells, levitation, paralysis, terror, and images of frightening intruders. Once considered very rare, about half of all people are now believed to experience sleep paralysis sometime during their life.

Sleep paralysis strikes as a person is moving into or out of REM (rapid eye movement) sleep, the deepest part of sleep. During REM sleep the body is largely disconnected from the brain leaving the body paralyzed. Sleep paralysis is the result of premature (or persistent) mind-body disconnection as one is about to enter into (or exit from) REM sleep.

Sleep paralysis occurs most often after jet lag or periods of sleeplessness that interrupt the normal REM patterns. It affects both sexes equally and occurs at all ages but is most common in teenagers. Sleep paralysis can be familial and may be genetic (inherited) in some cases."

Jewbuz H Stalin. This explains a lot. There goes my explanation (it wasn't that silly).

I should honestly not be on my blog right now. My Public Law book is of a gargantuan composition and so far has bested me in more regards than one.

Why than am I being of the same nature as those who bitch, moan and do not rectify? The same inexplicable reason as they are of that nature. No better or worse off than them.

My perpetual visitations upon your blogs is during the time when I am typing out drafts for posts. WHICH I should not be doing but it has always been this annoying, inconveniently vile habit of my mind to feel inspired when I am studying. And when I say inspired, I do not mean in real terms of creative-prowess. This personal, sub-conscious plane which I have yet not acquainted you with yet for lack of enthusiasm, where jingoism of purple, homage paid to random patterns of marble, creamy is functionality and all nouns growing up to be adjectives is commonplace. Rarely published.

My play is a go. Duago shall be done by the end of this summer. I need a mime-choreographer. My brain refuses to keep the process at bay till the 20th of May. No, it will not. I am put into this freaky limbo of fear and anticipation where I know for sure that during my Law exam, I will get some epiphany about dramatic representation. Some, DEEPLY, ENGAGING, intrusion of my train of thought. And...what tears me apart at this point is not knowing why I am treating this as an imminent reality, or which outcome terrifies me more: forgetting the idea after the exam or screwing up my exam. Gah. I over-thunked.

http://facethehorror.com/

Looking forward to the indie-game of the year is quite distracting as well. I miss quite a few friends. I wish I was travelling with them over this summer.

This that and a drizzle of procrastination.

Perhabz I think that telling you lot this will give some degree of substance to my hiatus. Yes. It is. For those of you reading. See you in 13 days.

I'm a slave of how it used to be

I'm a rock.

"It is wrong! In your arms it is pedantic and inane!" the dinosaur waved his stubby claws and wailed. He sighed and ughed and puffed a cigarette. His annoyance peaked, of which this nameless faceless was the architect. He took a moment to mentally note, not having the purple highlighter with which he normally wrote. 'Must make mountain of posers! Or stacked conveniently enough to run over with a bull-dozer!'

A distant reality away, had been the fateful day. The dinosaur sat in Necromancy school, in one of the years where everyone in the batch was a tool. He came across his pupil to be. "Hiiiiiii can you help me?"

O_o ?

\

=O Rawr (not a man in an invisibility cloak running around)

/

"Yes that is what they pay me for, what is the nature of your problem I must implore?"

"Yaar I have no interest in Global Warming. Why must I learn of such a thing!"

"You're a generation too late to consider it a myth, thats how you could have gotten away with it."

"Hellloooooo. I don't try to be adorable, I am mellow."

"Insecure much? It never occurred to me as such."

"Nooo naaa, but you were telling that girl you thought that, yeah."

"That didn't happen."

"In the real life version it did....BAHAHAHAHAHAHA...OH.."

"I must suspend my disbelief, I doubt this query will be brief."

"Cool. Buy me fries and to shorten it... I might try."

"Badly phrased, kids these days."

"WE ARE GOING TO BE SUCH AWESOME FRIENDS!"

"I'm a teacher okay, I must stick to my ways."

"But I sense that despite your mood, you shall always buy me food."

************************

The preoccupations of a dinosaur do not usually exceed those that he does not usually need. Every once in a while, we do things contrary to our style.

"I have a Parliamentary thesis to submit."

" Bahaha. I have no interest in it...."

"I have read it thrice."

"Is it really nice?"

"I find it overly-written."

"Meh, just put in a picture of a kitten."

"In real life such tactics would not help you would not succeed."

"Of such a success I have no need."

"Bitter are we? Bitter, vinegar in hummus."

"You'll see me one day big and PHAMOUS!".

************************

"The dark side has no cookies. That I believe is the trap."

"Yaar you keep talking about this crap."

"And what bothers you may I ask..?"

"Asking and understanding are not the same task."

"Draamey naa karo."

"Teacher matt bano."

"Come on. The facts."

"They have magnificent characters to act!"

"And you don't?"

"I won't..."

"And why?"

"Lolgirlyface is enacting the sky!"

"The one who tlk leik dis eh?"

"No she's Arxshi6ay."

"And why is this not letting you sleep?"

"How do I top that! It is so deep!"

"It is clichéd and overrated."

"I am however easily intimidated."

"You need to find a depiction that is quite you..."

"Like you did with the dinosaur? I too must do."

"No... I really am a dinosaur."

"Uh okay then..."

***************

I'm a rock, I'm a rock, I'm a rock, I'm a rock, I'M A ROCK *shifty eyes*

(Some times she's a frog)

You're welcome to join us

No I have no intention of going in the water,

But I'll come if you want.

Yes I do have spare clothes and laughter.

I'll use them when you want.

Freezing enough but you want to go deeper inside.

But Pebbles bruise my feet.

Guide me, give me your hand or take mine.

Find my balance in both our feet.

Cause tomorrow I'm chasing options and security.

Yes I've found my enthusiasm to dine on the rocks.

Thanks, I'll find my own place to sit,
To not decide between hot and cold ground I chose socks.

And I'll dig my feet inside while I sit.
I'll wish I had in my possession an excuse that would validate,
For me to stay there.
The sun isn't as big as last time and I don't have time to wait.
Again I'll come there.
But tomorrow I'm chasing options and security.


If you go into the sea once more pull out your pockets,
I've learnt from last time.
Sand won't deposit inside and collect shells to make lockets
There might be a next time.
As we exit the water, savouring it like you're supposed to,
I don't know if I am.
I'll smell the salt, walk a little slower and thats all I'll do.
I don't think I am.
From tomorrow I'm chasing options and security. 

Pursued by a bench-occupier

An object of an intrigue are you now,
With a discernible list of attributes,
That make me dart towards you.
A charming piece of personality,
An engineered array of surprises.
Will I really bend far to know you?
Compatible with my imagination,
Sufficiently eccentric to absorb me.
You were such or I have unleashed you.
Do you really talk to colours when I ask,
Humour me to keep up with standards?
I'm not sure the randomness annoys you.
Insecure about old this and new that,
How to gauge the endearment,
When imperfection is worn by you.
Why are you on my plate; my next chase,
That I will not get up for until,
I have sufficiently stared at you.
Inconsistent with many avenues,
That are availed on the path you tread.
My writing is only as erratic as you.
Don't think you mesmerize my senses,
A drop of gold in spontaneity and planning.
I compare and contrast all rarity to you.
Don't think this undoes a value,
That you will be looked forward to,
Until I try my best to come by you.
Would you appeal to me and myself,
Had we met a decade ago.
Have I been looking for you?
And if instead I could bargain off with,
Respect and happiness for us both,
Would I let go of you?
Why do you give the perfect impression,
Of the mixed excitement and security.
Is that what I expect of you?
Feelings are anything but a badge of surety,
But they are substantially existent.
And it scares me: I question myself about you.
And I wonder if I'll have another cigarette.
Are you the excuse or the substance.
I really shouldn't associate this bench with you.